what you
feel
you feel
for others
who can’t
your permission
to feel
to be
to live
allows
everyone
else
to do
the same
your being
matters
more than
you think
every experience
every movement
is part of
existence
and therefore
has a
place
whatever
you hold
back
can’t be
experienced
in this
moment
your showing
up
is wanted
and needed
the world
is a
lonely
place
without
your
being
here
is the title of a new exhibition and book, the second collaboration between Naomi Ojima and me. My poetry and Naomi’s visual art are of contemporary nature and beautifully complementary in their simplicity and subtleness.
Our artwork is a conversation between word – form and colour. It aims to describe the experience of the present moment – what arises and wants to be expressed when awareness and stillness meets creativity.
We believe that the source of all movements is Love. It is what inspired us both to collaborate and create a collection of present moment-expressions, inviting our readers to pause and to enter the multidimensionality of Now, to feel Love at its core.
The exhibition is currently on display at the Bakehouse in Findhorn and can be seen until 29th of October.
Our book with the same title is on sale there as well and can be ordered online via the following link:
http://www.blurb.co.uk/b/8947455-multidimensional-moment
There is a preview into the book where you can see some of Naomi’s artwork and read some of my poems.
On Culture Day (29 September) during the Findhorn Bay Festival I was giving two poetry readings in the Pop Up Cafe in Forres Town-Hall. Thank you to everyone who came to listen and to see me. It was a beautiful experience, speaking to a friendly and open audience and noticing how words can touch and leave an imprint.
… feeling a bit like a celebrity whilst signing our books, thank you David Janes for having been the bookseller!
Here is one more excerpt from the book – as a taster:
Life
has no
safety net
no
guarantee
for
happiness
instead it
offers
a constant
invitation
to become
present
a door
to freedom
challenge
and
joy
to Love
revealed
as core
and standing ground
–
when being
fully here
–
the question
of
safety
disappears
To see more of Naomi’s artwork, please go to:
Strong emotions can be scary, yet we have them. Often we try to avoid them and distract ourselves to not feel. It can be a powerful and integrative experience to have an emotion moving through your body, ideally in a safely held place and with a trusted person that can be your compassionate witness. You may experience that you ‘come out on the other end’, still alive and possibly ‘more here’ than before.
Feelings are valuable allies on our life’s path, we can learn to be with them – they can actually make us feeling more alive… This poem is an observation of the rising and moving of a feeling through the body. I can recommend practicing it
observe
it coming
don’t run
away
if you
can
feel it
let it
rise
in your
body
the waves
of emotion
your nervous
system
activated
an inner
tremor
blood
pulsating
your body
might
tremble
too
this is
life
in motion
you may
fear
it’s too
much
you may
fear to
drown
stay
with
it
ride the
wave
be the
wave
don’t be
afraid
trust
your
body
your
vessel
it is
made
for this
we are
wired
to feel
life wants
to move
through
us
and with
every
emotion
felt
an inch
less
contracted
there is
space
an opening
for more
of our
wholeness
to come
in
this is
LOVE
in
action
I’ve been collecting shells on the beach. Usually I like the pristine ones, I marvel at the mother of pearl shine on the inside, the varied patterns or the bright white washed surface on some species.
But today I found myself looking out for something different. There are those shells called Buccinum undatum which often don’t make it to the beach in one shape. Yet there are many broken ones and those are the ones I felt drawn to. My search – it was not really a search as there are many lying around – presented me a collection of very different shapes and stages of brokenness, and to me each one of them revealed an exquisite beauty. Back at home I felt like a treasure hunter, emptying my sandy bag with a sense of joy and curiosity, looking forward to inspect each finding even closer.
Quite a while ago I found one of those white washed, broken shells and took it home. It was sitting on my desk for a long time. The shell represented a phase of life I’ve been in. Something was about to break, not usually something to look forward to. Yet, the shell helped me to be with this process in communicating something new to me. As I inspected this piece of nature I could see the beautiful spiral inside, perfectly shaped, and it seemed as if the spiral had no beginning and no end. It felt like there is movement in the brokenness and I realized that I would not have been able to see this winding beauty at the core if the outer shell were not broken away.
This is where I connected brokenness with openness. The shell on first glance looked broken, vulnerable. Looking closer I could see the intricacy, beauty and perfection still inside. It didn’t appear destroyed, on the contrary. I actually had the sense that what had broken off were the parts that made space for the essential to be revealed. The spiral – the backbone of the shell, so to say. So this became my metaphor and support when times got tricky and parts in my life, parts of me, seemed to fall away or apart.
Now after some years I am back to collecting the broken shells again. This time my focus is on the variety of brokenness and the array of beauty that gets revealed. Some still have the mother of pearl shine, others are white washed or beautifully patterned, and all of them, no matter how broken they are, display their spiral backbone, the winding movement that seems undisturbed and keeps moving.
My collection seems to reflect Life itself – and that being pristine and/or being broken are phases in the big circle. It is not about being whole or broken – either – or – it is rather both – and.
So it is not that I am completely and always at peace with being broken – I have, however, this beautiful exhibition of brokenness on my windowsill which reminds me every day of the beauty of vulnerability – the diversity and even strength that comes to life when something else seems to fall away.
I’m breaking open – aliveness can breathe….
On some days I wake up with a heavy heart for no apparent reason. Despite of a blue sky and bright sunshine something can’t participate fully in the beauty of life. Everything seems to be a bit subdued.
My remedy is to go for a walk. I am blessed to have the beach and the sea at my doorstep so it doesn’t take long to immerse myself with the stunning landscape of the Scottish coastline. The fresh air, the movement of my body and myriads of small and bigger elements around me helps me to connect with myself and my surrounding.
Whilst I am walking I also feel my heart, still heavy. The gentle rolling in of the waves is soothing. I am walking on wet sand, the sea beside me, the sun warming my face. Something asks me to stop and to sit down.
I am pondering on my heart, or better, sense that place in my chest that seems to feel more contracted today than on other days. I am breathing and just sit there. As I look down on the ground I see a pair of clams, open but still connected, and there is another one, and another one. Suddenly there seems to be a gathering of clams, open and still connected.
This sight touches me and a poem comes to mind that I have written a while ago. It is one of my favorites and whenever I re-visit the words I feel a settling, a ‘yes, this is how it is’. Sitting with this poem seems to make a difference, something has moved, in me.
And for today this is what helps me to be with the feelings in my heart. There doesn’t have to be a solution. Often what is needed is just a sitting down, a being with that what I can’t put my finger on. Tears may come, sadness may come and something starts to soften whilst it is embraced with presence and tenderness.
So, here my poem, which still hasn’t lost it’s magic:
how to
love
with a
broken
heart
–
pick up
the pieces
and feel
the hurt
breathe
and place
all of it
on the
altar
of presence
–
once
the melting
has
happened
your heart
will
know
the pain
of the
world
–
it has
become
Love
itself
–
your broken
heart
transformed
into
an open
heart
The new year has started and much is moving in my life.
I like movement – and I like the pauses between, the stillness that reveals so much when I consent to listen deeply.
The quality of being in silence is a different one from the quality of being engaged. It feels honest. Action can come from different places, I notice. There are initiatives, responses, reactions, there may be an impulse. Often it is not easy to discern where an authentic movement comes from.
My intention for this new year is to invite more of the pausing, silence, awareness to listen and watch, to hear, see and feel the difference amongst my movements. To be and become a pursuer of authenticity – loving authenticity.
It just feels good to be honest from the heart – lets be honest….
so…
are my movements
authentic
what is influenced
by what happens
in the field
is there a separation
where does my mind
want to go
where do patterns
get triggered
and respond
in activation
~
I want to
live the movement
of the heart
where Love
touches
my innermost
where I am
prompted
to express
expand
and touch
the heart
of others
the heart
of the
world
* * *
Wishing you an authentic 2018 – with much Love
presence
the gateway
to
what is
communication
the bridge
to
the other
silence
lets you
sink
into your
heart
there is
home
there you
find
what you
are
looking
for
LOVE
dwells
there
waiting
for you
to be
recognised
and
lived
it is
who
you
are
